It’s not always the easiest thing to chat someone up. First impressions count for a lot, and if there’s no chemistry within the first 5 minutes of meeting, you’re probably not in with a chance. Whether you’re painfully shy or brimming with confidence, there are a few things you can do to hone your flirting skills and improve your chance of wooing the object of your desire. Before you know it, that mysterious stranger, blonde escort girl or your sister’s hot friend will be putty in your hands!

First of all, visualise in your head how you want the situation to go. Think about possible positive outcomes that could happen, and focus on those. Don’t expect your conversation to go exactly the same way because you can’t predict how she will react, but visualising it in advance will help you to approach her with a more positive outlook, feeling more comfortable. If you believe that it could go well, it’s much more likely to.

Before you approach her, make sure you’ve made eye contact. This is some of the strongest body language you can use – if you manage to hold her gaze, there’s a good chance that you’re in. It’s also a good way to detect if she’s not interested; if she quickly looks away and doesn’t look back again, don’t waste your time going to talk to her.

Never approach a girl with a big group of your friends; she will feel intimidated and under pressure. If she’s alone or with one other woman, go over alone. Whatever you do, don’t send your friend over to say that you like her; this kind of behaviour should be left behind at school and will make her think much less of you.

If you are nervous, try not to let it show too much. If you’re relaxed and at ease, she will be too. If you’re anxious and twitchy, it will immediately put her on edge and she may not feel comfortable talking to you. Stick to light conversation topics that you both have in common, such as your surroundings, the music that’s playing or a mutual friend. Now is not the best time to get into a lengthy discussion about politics or abortion. You don’t want to turn it into an argument!

Finally, take time to listen to what she has to say, don’t bombard her with questions and don’t spend all your time together bragging about your huge boat or fast car. Even that can be a turn off!