What Do Your Pants Say About You?

I bet you feel pretty cool walking along the street with your Spiderman pants on. Nobody else can see them – it’s your own Superhero secret. You’ve worn comic book themed underwear since you were a kid and have no intention of giving it up now, even though you’re 34 years old… unless you’re on the pull, in which case you’ll make an exception for your Calvin Kleins. But what happens if you get lucky unexpectedly? What if you’re hit by a car, and while you’re unconscious a sexy nurse cuts off your clothes? You could blow your chances!

Women often judge men by what type of pants a man wears – it says more about your personality than you realise. Here’s what our escort girls deduct from a man’s choice of underwear:

Superhero/Cartoon Pants This is a man who has never grown up. He’s still a boy at heart, andmay still rely on his Mum for confidence boosts. Probably enjoys larking about with his mates and seeing how many beers he can down in an hour. A woman may be put off by a lack of maturity, but if she’s a fellow comic book buff you’ll be in there! They also show a fun, carefree streak.

Tighty Whiteys Also known as briefs or Y-Fronts, these are another type of underwear that will make you look more like a boy than a man. Girls will wonder if your Mum still buys your undies. They’re not a particularly sexy look, but points for comfort if you like everything to stay in place. Less chance of getting a wedgie, so a good choice for physical activity.

Boxer Shorts These are one of the most popular choices amongst adult men; they would be the least embarrassing option to be caught in unawares. Avoid loud prints and patterns – keep it plain if you want to look stylish underneath your clothes. Some men don’t like these because it’s all a bit too free and breezy down there, and they do have a tendency to ride up.

Boxer-Briefs Like the ones worn by Calvin Klein models, these are great for athletic types. They hold everything in place and look appealing to women. Not a sensible choice if you’re of a larger build, but available in a selection of colours and brands to bulk out your underwear drawer.

Thongs Leave these to the escort girls and Chippendales. Enough said.

Old Favourites If any of your pants have holes or stains, throw them out immediately. If a woman ever sees them, she will think you’re a slob and possible quite unhygienic. Unfortunately, as comfortable as they are, these are not an option for a man who wants to get laid.

Hopefully this has given you an idea of what the ladies see under your trousers… how did you do?